Transcript
[0:02] so what i'd like to talk about tonight
[0:04] and we'll see how it goes um i'd like to
[0:07] talk about
[0:08] the most basic truths in buddhist
[0:10] teaching
[0:12] and i've come to it
[0:13] in part because in these last months
[0:16] i've been talking about the war in
[0:18] ukraine and the pandemic and the
[0:20] collective anxiety and all these other
[0:22] things
[0:25] and it feels like it's time to come back
[0:28] to the basics
[0:30] i'll start
[0:32] with a poem
[0:34] that answers a kind of question for us
[0:36] as human beings human incarnation
[0:40] what kind of world did we incarnate into
[0:45] so this is a poem from
[0:47] bridget lowry that i often read
[0:52] in the strange early morning half-light
[0:55] we set
[0:57] it is by the way a meditation poem
[1:00] in the cloudiness of our questioning we
[1:02] sit
[1:04] in our madness and our clarity we sit
[1:08] in the midst of too much to do we said
[1:12] in the warm arms of our shared sorrow we
[1:15] set
[1:17] in community
[1:18] and in loneliness we said
[1:21] in sweet exhaustion we sit
[1:24] in the blazing energy of being alive we
[1:27] sit
[1:28] here with the singing of the
[1:30] coyotes and the crickets
[1:33] here with each electric bird song
[1:37] here with the rippling of breezes and
[1:40] the great trees and the dry grasses
[1:44] here with the cobwebs and the clouds
[1:48] and the teeming masses
[1:52] and the dusty road upon us
[1:55] us in the sound and the sound in us
[1:59] us in the world
[2:01] and the world in us
[2:06] so here we are with this human
[2:08] incarnation
[2:10] given a human life
[2:13] and of course at this time
[2:16] maybe in all times but right now there
[2:18] are things that are quite difficult
[2:20] especially if you're here where i am in
[2:22] north america
[2:23] there's the growing fire season and then
[2:26] we look at the images in the news and
[2:28] there's
[2:29] floods and
[2:31] refugees and climate change and of
[2:33] course the wars ukraine and myanmar and
[2:37] libya and so many other places
[2:40] so there's all those kind of
[2:42] difficult images
[2:45] and
[2:46] troubles of this human realm that we're
[2:48] born into
[2:50] and then last night there was the
[2:52] eclipse the blood red moon
[2:55] really kind of magic to watch the
[2:57] eclipse because you could see the shadow
[2:59] of our sphere moving across the face of
[3:02] the moon
[3:04] and at least in north america there's
[3:06] spring and blossoms
[3:10] you know it's the plowing season in some
[3:13] places
[3:15] maybe that would be the beginning of the
[3:16] rainy season for others and
[3:19] there is in california this year a
[3:22] renewed migration of monarch butterflies
[3:24] that not so many had been seen for a
[3:27] long time
[3:30] so there's the
[3:31] troubles
[3:33] and there's the springtime and the music
[3:36] of the spheres
[3:38] and when i was first taught in the
[3:40] monasteries in thailand and burma and so
[3:43] forth
[3:45] the key to the basic natures of life
[3:48] basic nature of life
[3:50] was repeated over and over again
[3:53] everything is a nietzsche or impermanent
[3:57] look at it
[3:58] everything is dukkha
[4:00] which means
[4:02] unsatisfactory
[4:04] and everything is anata anicha duken
[4:07] anata means
[4:09] emptiness selflessness and so forth and
[4:11] we'll talk about all of them
[4:14] and the reason that these were repeated
[4:16] over and over
[4:17] is they were saying
[4:19] if you see these you see with the eyes
[4:22] of wisdom
[4:24] so zen masters sing-son sansine korean
[4:27] zen master with whom i studied he said
[4:30] once a great man
[4:32] sat under the bodhi tree
[4:34] saw the morning star
[4:37] and gained enlightenment
[4:39] he saw
[4:41] the sky was blue
[4:43] the earth was brown
[4:46] and all things were rising and passing
[4:49] things were just as they are
[4:51] and then
[4:53] he really
[4:55] knew the nature of things and his
[4:57] enlightenment
[4:58] was complete
[5:01] he saw things the way they are
[5:04] arising and passing blue sky brown earth
[5:09] or krishnamurti the great sage said
[5:12] it is the truth that liberates
[5:16] and not your efforts to be free
[5:20] seeing the way things are
[5:24] and of course to survive because we have
[5:26] this very complex human brain
[5:29] the tre the brain besides seeing the way
[5:31] things are here in the present also
[5:34] tries to
[5:35] anticipate
[5:37] keep you safe and fix and stabilize and
[5:39] imagine
[5:41] so the first of these basic truths
[5:44] is a nietzsche impermanence
[5:47] and you say well
[5:48] what's the big deal
[5:50] of course things change
[5:52] why is it why is this news
[5:55] you know
[5:57] the stock market's gone down then it
[5:58] will go up sometime it's just what
[6:00] things do
[6:01] the phases of the moon change
[6:05] but there's something deeper
[6:08] to feel and know
[6:10] and the point of it is seeing with the
[6:12] eyes of wisdom it brings a kind of
[6:14] liberation
[6:19] here's a phrase from the texts
[6:22] karma changes or karma can change
[6:26] like the swish of a horse's tail
[6:30] that is at one time everything seems
[6:32] hunky-dory and fine and going along
[6:36] and then
[6:37] in a moment
[6:39] an accident
[6:40] or a diagnosis
[6:43] you know or an opportunity or an
[6:45] asteroid or who knows what a pandemic
[6:48] and everything gets turned topsy turvy
[6:51] karma can change like the swish
[6:53] of a horse's tail and then all of a
[6:56] sudden you go oh yeah whoops and echa
[6:59] things are not as stable as we thought
[7:04] not so solid and we're watching the
[7:06] contest of empires the russian empire
[7:09] trying to get back you know and the
[7:11] chinese empire trying to get
[7:13] big the way it was a thousand years ago
[7:16] or something in the u.s empire
[7:18] what did chief seattle say
[7:22] tribe follows tribe and nation follows
[7:25] nation
[7:27] even empires come and go
[7:31] and wars arise for time
[7:34] and then they end
[7:36] there's always an end to a war even
[7:37] however horrific and terrible and sad it
[7:40] is
[7:41] then it ends
[7:44] then of course there might be a new war
[7:45] and a new conflict
[7:48] this is a nietzsche it's where we live
[7:51] where you live where i live
[7:55] now in psychology 101 there's an
[7:57] experiment that's often done
[8:01] in which three buckets of water are
[8:03] placed in the front of the room
[8:06] one bucket has hot water quite hot one
[8:09] bucket has room temperature and one
[8:11] bucket has ice water with ice cubes in
[8:13] it
[8:15] and the unsuspecting
[8:17] student who volunteers to come up for
[8:19] the psychological experiment
[8:21] is invited to take
[8:23] two hands and place one in the bucket of
[8:26] ice water and one in the bucket of quite
[8:28] hot water and see how long they can
[8:30] stand it having their hands in there
[8:32] usually 30 seconds or a minute or
[8:34] whatever it's not that easy
[8:37] then the next instruction when they take
[8:39] their hands out is to put them in the
[8:41] bucket of room temperature water
[8:44] and let them touch each other
[8:47] and in that moment there's this funny
[8:49] expression that comes over the face of
[8:51] the psychology student
[8:53] because to one hand
[8:56] the water feels really cold that water
[8:59] that and that was in the hot water
[9:01] and to the other hand touching it
[9:03] the water feels really hot the hand that
[9:05] had been in the ice water and their
[9:07] perceptions are
[9:09] warped somehow like which perception
[9:12] can i trust
[9:16] you know my dear friends
[9:18] and i have to include myself in this
[9:20] we get
[9:21] pretty attached to our perceptions of
[9:24] things
[9:26] and yet they're not really
[9:29] quite certain are they
[9:32] the buddha said at one point people who
[9:34] cling to views
[9:37] views people who cling to views the wise
[9:40] ones he said don't cling to views
[9:43] but people who cling to views
[9:45] go about the world annoying others
[9:49] that's sort of one of the passages that
[9:50] i think is a little bit of humor from
[9:52] the buddha
[9:53] or maybe he was just experiencing that
[9:58] so what changes our perceptions you know
[10:00] you're a libertarian or a republican or
[10:03] a democrat or a whatever that certain
[10:05] portion of your life and then it might
[10:07] change
[10:09] your views change what else changes
[10:13] it's said in the buddhist text that who
[10:15] we are
[10:16] are the five skandas sometimes
[10:18] translated as the five aggregates
[10:21] or the five rivers is how i like to
[10:24] translate it a river of physical
[10:26] experience and sensations of the body
[10:29] a river of
[10:31] feelings a river of perceptions and
[10:35] views a river of ma of
[10:37] of perceptions and thoughts a river of
[10:40] thoughts
[10:41] and images
[10:43] [Music]
[10:44] and a river of consciousness
[10:47] and they're always changing
[10:52] you could see it when you're sad in
[10:53] meditation
[10:55] nothing stayed the same for a moment as
[10:57] you paid attention
[11:03] now here's why anita is important to
[11:06] understand
[11:09] because everything is changing
[11:13] the more you cling and hold on
[11:16] the more you suffer
[11:19] holding on is called rope burn
[11:22] you try to hold on to things and they're
[11:24] changing
[11:25] whether it's the views or the world or
[11:27] the empires or your emotions
[11:31] i remember this story of
[11:34] a couple these two men who got married
[11:36] and part of their celebration in their
[11:38] life
[11:39] was to take a road trip to montreal to
[11:41] the biggest bonsai tree garden in north
[11:43] america amazing bonsais imported from
[11:47] japan and china and grown there
[11:50] and so they got in the car and they
[11:51] drove a long way up to into canada from
[11:54] where they lived in new england
[11:57] and they got there one of the guys had
[11:59] arranged the trip and was really happy
[12:01] because he loved bonsai they both did
[12:04] and they could
[12:05] and they got to this gates of this huge
[12:08] garden and it was padlocked shot and
[12:10] this was before the pandemic
[12:12] sorry we're closed on whatever it is
[12:15] tuesday wednesday and thursday we're
[12:17] open these days of the week
[12:19] and
[12:21] his partner looked at him and said
[12:23] didn't you check on this and got all
[12:25] upset and frustrated we drove all the
[12:27] way here
[12:29] and the guy who'd
[12:33] done the driving and
[12:35] brought them there
[12:37] just got quiet and said let's see
[12:40] let's take a little walk here maybe we
[12:42] can figure something out what's he going
[12:45] to figure out he's going to call
[12:46] somebody is there a way to get in can
[12:48] they open it
[12:50] and he just started walking along the
[12:53] huge this is a giant botanical garden
[12:55] along the gate and along the front wall
[12:58] high wall you could see the beautiful
[13:00] fruit trees and amazing trees inside
[13:02] you walked and walked just trying to get
[13:04] quiet figure out what should we do next
[13:07] and went around the corner at the end of
[13:09] that long front
[13:11] part of the garden and started to walk
[13:13] further
[13:14] and now all of a sudden
[13:16] to his and their surprise the wall
[13:18] stopped
[13:20] it was a facade on the roadside of the
[13:22] garden
[13:24] but as they walked along the side
[13:27] there was no wall
[13:29] and they could walk right in which they
[13:31] did
[13:32] whatever day it was close or not
[13:36] and one of them smiled and the other
[13:39] sort of apologized you know how it is
[13:41] being a couple
[13:43] but the idea was
[13:45] that instead of saying things
[13:48] are or aren't possible
[13:51] instead of getting so frustrated
[13:54] to be open and say oh
[13:56] i wonder what's going to happen next
[13:59] to have that spirit
[14:02] because the truth is
[14:04] that the body produces 500 sorry 100
[14:09] billion new red blood cells every day
[14:13] that's 50 000 in the time that i read
[14:16] these few sentences your body's making
[14:18] that
[14:19] there are a trillion living creatures in
[14:22] your gut and in parts of your body
[14:24] little ones that live in your eyelashes
[14:26] and your eyebrows and so forth all
[14:28] having their little bacteria virus buggy
[14:31] little life being born and dying
[14:34] you are this
[14:35] walking my friend wes calls it a walking
[14:38] feedlot for you know for this entire
[14:41] cornucopia of life
[14:45] you lose 600 000 particles of skin an
[14:48] hour and it's replaced
[14:51] in that hour
[14:53] you get a new stomach lining regrown
[14:56] every five days
[14:57] and all the major parts of your liver
[15:01] are recreated every six weeks
[15:05] your eyebrows take four months
[15:08] but who you are
[15:10] is this river of change
[15:13] that's constantly changing and opening
[15:16] and
[15:17] evolving
[15:20] and as we become wise
[15:23] we step back and see the mystery of it
[15:25] instead of how it's supposed to be
[15:28] so i had a friend who was the
[15:31] hospice director of a very big hospice
[15:34] for some years
[15:36] and one day he went in he'd been working
[15:38] with a lot of the patients who are dying
[15:42] and there was an old italian man there
[15:45] whose family kept coming in to attend to
[15:48] him his children and so forth and they
[15:50] came in one morning and they said we
[15:51] need to talk to the hospice director
[15:54] they said we have a problem a question
[15:57] our father is here it was three of the
[16:00] children
[16:01] and he's very close to dying
[16:04] but his younger brother was killed
[16:06] yesterday in a car accident
[16:10] and we don't know whether we should tell
[16:11] him because he's so close to dying
[16:13] himself maybe we'll agitate him and make
[16:16] him feel terrible maybe he was just
[16:18] leave him and let him be in that state
[16:20] of loving his brother and not knowing
[16:22] about the loss
[16:25] what should we do
[16:28] and my friend the hospice director said
[16:30] well
[16:31] let's go in and see your father
[16:33] and see how he's doing and maybe we'll
[16:36] understand better when we do that so
[16:38] here's this kind of open-minded response
[16:41] not exactly this is right or that's
[16:43] wrong
[16:45] and they went in and they sat
[16:47] with the
[16:48] father who was pretty weak but still
[16:51] conscious and could speak
[16:53] and they said we're so glad to see you
[16:55] dad and how are you you know he said i'm
[16:57] getting weaker and my time is coming
[17:00] and then he looked at them and he said
[17:02] don't you have something to tell me
[17:06] and they said
[17:07] what do you mean he said
[17:11] about my brother
[17:13] don't you know he died
[17:15] and they said well how do you know that
[17:17] he said oh i've been talking to him all
[17:20] morning
[17:24] there's a little bit of a mystery for
[17:25] you
[17:26] and i could tell you 50 more stories
[17:28] like this
[17:30] who are we
[17:33] born into this body this human
[17:35] incarnation
[17:39] who do you think you are
[17:43] so things change
[17:45] and i remember a retreat
[17:47] that was taught by michelle mcdonald she
[17:49] was teaching in east coast in our center
[17:51] in barrie
[17:54] and she also worked in a family program
[17:56] so she liked to work with little kids
[17:59] and she brought this group of little
[18:01] kids i think they were like
[18:02] kindergarteners or something
[18:04] and said let's talk about things being
[18:07] born and things dying and kids are
[18:08] interested in that
[18:11] so they talked about it some and then
[18:12] she said i'll tell you what let's let's
[18:15] learn more about it you go out in the
[18:17] woods which was around where we are and
[18:19] bring back whatever you find that's
[18:22] that's died and we'll look at it
[18:24] together
[18:25] and the kids ran out excitedly and they
[18:27] brought some dead leaves or some sticks
[18:29] and one kid found a little bit of a
[18:31] skeleton of some mouse that had died and
[18:34] it was there
[18:35] you know and somebody else the other kid
[18:37] found a bone or they found some
[18:39] something else that was dying they
[18:41] brought them all back together
[18:42] made a pile and said wow
[18:45] all these things in the forest have died
[18:48] and then she said well
[18:51] what do you think about this you know
[18:53] trying to
[18:55] understand how it looked to these
[18:57] five-year-olds
[19:00] and one of the kids said well it looks
[19:01] like everything you know in the forest
[19:05] there for a while and it dies
[19:07] and another little kid piped up and said
[19:09] yeah it's a good thing
[19:11] because if
[19:12] the trees and
[19:14] the branches and things didn't die then
[19:16] there'd be more and more and more of
[19:17] them they get so close together and then
[19:19] there'd be no room for us
[19:24] they knew
[19:26] somehow
[19:28] that change actually is the opportunity
[19:30] for something new to come
[19:33] and that death isn't something
[19:36] wrong
[19:37] it's natural as emily dickinson said
[19:42] because i did not stop for death he
[19:44] kindly stopped for me
[19:48] it's just part of incarnation so you
[19:51] might as well relax
[19:55] and become the loving awareness become
[19:57] the sky of awareness
[20:00] and see how things are changing
[20:04] but then there arises all our anxiety
[20:07] the emotions of being anxious and worry
[20:09] the stories we tell ourselves the body
[20:12] what about coven what about the stock
[20:14] market what about you know
[20:16] whatever it is that worries you what
[20:18] about family all these things
[20:21] and the mind kicks in it's trying to
[20:22] protect you from change
[20:26] the practice
[20:27] is not to resist the anxiety and the
[20:30] thoughts
[20:31] not to judge them
[20:33] but to bow and say thank you
[20:35] thank you for trying to protect me
[20:38] i'm okay just now
[20:41] and not let the voices of anxiety
[20:45] take over the heart
[20:48] you can name them oh here's worry here's
[20:50] anxiety thank you
[20:53] and then ground yourself and become part
[20:55] of the earth or feel the openness of the
[20:58] sky
[20:59] through which the birds and the clouds
[21:01] and everything come and go or the
[21:03] trees of the forest renewing itself
[21:08] and people will call me
[21:10] you know friends people i've taught over
[21:12] the years and work with i'm going into
[21:14] surgery
[21:17] my teenage
[21:19] son is dealing with addiction he's in
[21:21] trouble
[21:23] and we talk about the specifics what you
[21:25] can do how do you resource yourself how
[21:27] do you support yourself
[21:29] and then often
[21:31] i'll say make an altar
[21:34] put a little altar with a picture of
[21:36] your teenage son on it and surround
[21:39] that picture
[21:41] with
[21:42] kuan yin or buddha or
[21:45] you know whoever you value let yourself
[21:48] reflect on who carries the spirit that
[21:51] most matters to you in this world
[21:54] whether they're alive now or whether
[21:57] they're an archetypal being the buddha
[21:59] or
[22:00] mother mary
[22:04] and make a bow
[22:06] maybe light a candle
[22:08] and say to mother mary and kuan yin and
[22:10] the buddha and so forth
[22:12] will you please hold my boy
[22:20] will you hold him
[22:24] so that i don't have to worry quite so
[22:25] much
[22:32] i am traveling
[22:34] at great speed toward a star in the
[22:37] milky way
[22:39] my heart's a little fast
[22:42] otherwise everything's okay
[22:46] the voice of a poet
[22:48] with a nietzsche we step back and say
[22:51] the galaxy is turning
[22:53] things change
[22:56] and we learn the trusting heart
[23:00] the practice of sitting in meditation is
[23:03] to learn the trusting heart
[23:05] oh nobly born it says remember your true
[23:08] nature
[23:10] become the loving awareness the shift of
[23:13] identity
[23:14] from that small worried person
[23:18] to the buddha that you are
[23:20] and i see it in my cohort you know i'm
[23:23] about to turn 77. i know a lot of dead
[23:26] people
[23:27] lots of friends who are sick many people
[23:30] in my address i used to have an address
[23:31] book now it's electronic whoa half of
[23:34] them aren't
[23:35] you're in this incarnation anymore it's
[23:38] happening
[23:39] you know
[23:41] they're moving off stage
[23:44] we're in the queue so to speak
[23:48] and then there are all these new
[23:49] grandchildren
[23:51] you know and and and what follows
[23:55] just reflect for a moment because life
[23:58] is renewing itself through you around
[24:00] you you're a part of it you are life
[24:02] renewing itself even as you get ready as
[24:06] you age
[24:07] and die
[24:09] you're in the recycle process we'll talk
[24:12] more
[24:13] but here's a reflection quiet yourself
[24:18] maybe even let your eyes close
[24:23] what is changing in your life
[24:31] what are the big things that are
[24:33] changing
[24:43] and what would the wisest part of you
[24:45] say
[24:47] in response to this change
[24:51] what would the wisest part say here's
[24:53] how to hold this
[24:59] you can know
[25:01] you already do
[25:08] it makes us come more alive
[25:11] more trusting this impermanence
[25:15] i think of my
[25:16] old friend and colleague steven levine
[25:19] we taught retreats together and
[25:22] taught and practiced together and
[25:23] remember
[25:24] he would ask people you'd say
[25:26] if you only had a short time to live
[25:30] he was teaching death and dying retreats
[25:33] you would say if you only had a short
[25:34] time to live
[25:37] who would you call
[25:43] what would you say
[25:52] and why are you waiting
[25:58] this is the wisdom of impermanence of
[26:01] trust
[26:02] and living fully just where we are
[26:06] then anitra goes to dukkha
[26:11] is this complicated
[26:13] term and has a lot of meanings but
[26:15] mostly it means things are insecure and
[26:17] uncertain
[26:19] or they're also translated as suffering
[26:24] and if we look with the eyes of wisdom
[26:27] well
[26:28] all we have to do is turn on the news
[26:30] and the
[26:31] conflict
[26:33] domestic terrorism and
[26:36] buffalo and the continuing scourge of
[26:39] racism
[26:40] as if some people are
[26:42] you know better than other people or the
[26:45] kind of
[26:49] really it's kind of crazy that here's a
[26:51] little child born and what particular
[26:54] color they are are they green or brown
[26:56] or black or white or yellow or right
[26:58] what color you are determines your value
[27:02] it's kind of insane
[27:05] but the suffering from it is enormous
[27:09] this is dukkha
[27:12] just like the wars are dukkha these are
[27:14] the big ones in the news the pandemic
[27:17] the climate change
[27:20] this is your human incarnation folks
[27:22] mine too
[27:24] so the buddha under the bodhi tree
[27:28] when he attained enlightenment at the
[27:31] time of the morning star like that poem
[27:33] said
[27:35] he sat quietly for a time as the story
[27:38] is told
[27:40] and then he turned his eye his wisdom
[27:42] eye
[27:43] toward the world of living beings across
[27:46] the whole world
[27:49] and he saw beings everywhere wanting to
[27:52] be happy
[27:54] yet often doing the very thing that made
[27:56] them unhappy
[28:00] and the tears of the great heart of
[28:03] compassion rolled down his cheeks
[28:07] and it said in one of the myths or
[28:09] stories that those tears turned into
[28:11] tara
[28:12] the goddess of infinite compassion
[28:16] was born out of those tears
[28:20] but he saw
[28:21] the sufferings of the world
[28:26] and immediately that great heart of
[28:28] compassion that was also the buddha
[28:30] nature began to shine in every direction
[28:35] so to understand dukkha there are three
[28:37] kinds of dukkha
[28:40] there's anichiduka
[28:42] that is the dukkha of change
[28:45] joy and sorrow
[28:48] praise and blame
[28:50] gain and loss
[28:52] pleasure and pain fame and disrepute
[28:56] however wonderful you know that
[28:58] incredible meal and that great vacation
[29:00] and that
[29:01] sexual ecstatic experience i hope you
[29:05] had at some time and that you know
[29:08] delicious spiritual
[29:10] you
[29:11] know fantastic awakening and so forth
[29:14] there's that little voice inside that
[29:16] says god i wish this would last
[29:20] but it doesn't
[29:23] the duke of change now the good thing is
[29:26] that when things are terrible they don't
[29:28] last either
[29:31] but this is one kind of duka that
[29:33] nothing lasts
[29:35] and seeing it with the
[29:37] eyes of wisdom and the heart go okay i
[29:40] have to really get this
[29:44] you can't hold on
[29:48] the second kind of dukkha is the duka of
[29:50] pain
[29:52] physical and mental pain
[29:55] and as part of what we learn in
[29:56] meditation is to sit and your knee hurts
[29:59] and your back hurts and you're having
[30:00] physical pain and we live in a culture
[30:02] that basically wants to uh
[30:05] you know
[30:06] sell you a prescription a painkiller the
[30:09] moment you're a little uncomfortable we
[30:11] live in a culture that fears discomfort
[30:14] you have to do anything to stay
[30:16] comfortable
[30:17] good luck
[30:19] it doesn't work that way
[30:21] but when you take your seat with some
[30:23] dignity and allow the itches and the
[30:25] pleasures and the pains and the
[30:27] tightness and the release and the
[30:28] opening and then the
[30:30] energies that are stuck in the body you
[30:32] allow all of that
[30:33] there becomes this
[30:35] opening of trust of loving awareness
[30:39] and a deepening capacity expanding the
[30:41] window of tolerance
[30:43] to hold it all in compassion
[30:46] and it's physical pain yours
[30:48] sometimes it's harder when it's the
[30:50] physical pain of someone near you
[30:53] and if you haven't learned to sit with
[30:55] it you can't hold somebody else's hand
[30:57] when they're in the hospital or at an
[30:59] accident or dying
[31:00] because you don't know how to be with it
[31:03] you don't know how to rest in loving
[31:06] awareness and say yes
[31:08] this too
[31:10] and then my friend vivek morty who's the
[31:12] surgeon general of the united states
[31:15] said that
[31:17] more than half of what comes into the
[31:19] hospitals and clinics across america
[31:22] is really based on emotional pain
[31:25] and suffering
[31:26] it's not even the physical suffering
[31:29] so this is the second kind of dukkha
[31:31] physical and mental pain
[31:34] you all know it because it's part of
[31:36] incarnation we have it
[31:38] and then the third kind which is called
[31:40] sankhara duka sankara means
[31:44] all the different
[31:47] uh
[31:49] all the things that make up or arise and
[31:52] make up the
[31:54] the whole world the form of the world of
[31:57] duality
[31:59] sankara duke is just
[32:02] the nature of things
[32:05] that to have
[32:07] a globe and a
[32:09] a world and a moon and a solar system
[32:13] and galaxies and so forth
[32:14] there's light and dark
[32:17] there's birth and death
[32:22] there is unbearable beauty amazing
[32:25] beauty
[32:27] and an ocean of tears
[32:33] and the buddha said at one point
[32:36] you've been born and died so many times
[32:40] that the bones of even one person's
[32:42] incarnation piled up would be as high as
[32:44] the great mount vepula taller than
[32:47] taller than everest that's how many
[32:49] times
[32:51] you've taken incarnation now it may or
[32:53] may not be true
[32:55] but what it was pointing to is that
[32:59] built into this human life
[33:02] is this
[33:04] birth and death
[33:06] and born and dying and born and dying
[33:08] each day each moment it's what we are
[33:12] and then the text goes on did you never
[33:14] see a man or a woman
[33:17] aged bent down
[33:19] with blotched limbs
[33:22] walking with a cane
[33:24] or sick and lying in bed did you never
[33:26] see a corpse
[33:28] after their life
[33:30] energy is passed from the body and did
[33:33] the thought never happen to come to you
[33:36] oh
[33:38] this will happen to me too
[33:42] but we live in a culture that says get
[33:44] more money more power more things
[33:46] consume do travel get these installed
[33:48] which are fine
[33:50] i liked some of them too
[33:53] but the message is if you do it right
[33:57] there won't be dukkha
[34:01] i'm sorry
[34:03] i am really sorry it's not how it works
[34:06] and i know people who are very little
[34:08] who are insanely joyful and happy
[34:12] and people who literally have billions
[34:15] of dollars in anything you could buy
[34:19] and really struggle with sorrow and
[34:22] unhappiness
[34:31] i could just ask
[34:33] how many of you have duca raise your
[34:35] hand but you don't have to bother
[34:38] because we know
[34:41] but just as impermanence
[34:44] gives birth to trust when you really see
[34:47] it deeply and you realize oh
[34:49] just as things like the kids saw in that
[34:51] forest
[34:52] are dying
[34:54] it makes room for something new to be
[34:56] born you begin to trust the process of
[34:59] turning even as you sit
[35:02] and the emotions come and you make space
[35:04] and there's sadness and fear and you
[35:06] allow it and it rises in a big way and
[35:08] then if you stay with it it passes
[35:11] and there you are still the loving
[35:13] witness of it all
[35:16] so just as a nietzsche
[35:18] impermanence gifts
[35:21] is the doorway to trust
[35:24] dukkha gives birth to compassion
[35:28] they come together they make a
[35:30] courageous heart
[35:32] tiknot han was asked not so long ago
[35:35] about climate change before he died
[35:40] and he was asked this from a student
[35:43] should i sit
[35:44] and meditate and go on retreat and
[35:46] somehow purify my heart will that help
[35:48] will that make the difference is that
[35:50] what i should do
[35:51] i'm worried about climate change
[35:55] or should i go out on the barricade
[35:57] should i protest should i get
[35:58] politically involved what should i do
[36:04] and take that han got quiet and looked
[36:06] back and said
[36:10] just listen
[36:13] until you can hear the sounds
[36:15] of the earth crying
[36:20] he didn't tell the student what to do
[36:23] he just said let yourself open
[36:26] and hear and feel and listen and sense
[36:29] the truth
[36:32] your grief becomes a doorway
[36:35] as ryoka says
[36:37] if the drink is bitter then turn
[36:39] yourself into wine
[36:44] so you sit
[36:46] and you quiet the mind and open the
[36:48] heart
[36:49] and you listen till you can hear
[36:52] the sounds of the earth crying
[36:58] you know there's a story of a old rabbi
[37:01] acidic rabbi
[37:04] who used to talk about the practice of
[37:06] prayer and meditation and he always uses
[37:08] a strange phrase
[37:11] he would say when you meditate when you
[37:13] pray when you offer these prayers
[37:15] you'll recite them feel them and place
[37:18] them on your
[37:21] heart and one day a student said rabbi
[37:25] rabbi why do you always use that
[37:27] strange phrase place them on your heart
[37:31] shouldn't we putting put them in our
[37:33] heart
[37:35] and the rabbi got quiet and he said
[37:39] it's not us who can put them in the
[37:41] heart
[37:42] maybe he said it's god that puts him in
[37:44] the heart or the divine or something
[37:46] deeper than our own will
[37:49] he said our practice is to recite them
[37:53] and place them on the heart
[37:56] so that someday
[37:58] when the heart breaks
[38:00] they will fall in
[38:05] and this is how grief and dukkha becomes
[38:07] the doorway
[38:10] to compassion
[38:13] a poem for you called everyday grace
[38:16] by stella nassanovic
[38:20] it can happen like that
[38:23] meeting at the auto repair
[38:25] buying tires amidst the smell of rubber
[38:28] the grating sound of jackhammers and
[38:30] drills
[38:32] anywhere we share stories
[38:34] grace flows between us
[38:38] the tire center waiting room
[38:41] becomes a healing place
[38:43] as one speaks of her husband's heart
[38:45] valve replacement
[38:47] bed sores from complications
[38:50] a man speaks of multiple surgeries notes
[38:53] his false appearance is strong and
[38:56] healthy
[38:58] i share my sister's death from breast
[39:00] casts cancer
[39:02] her youngest only seven
[39:06] a woman rises
[39:08] gives her name mrs henry
[39:11] then takes my hand
[39:13] suddenly
[39:15] an ordinary day
[39:17] becomes holy ground
[39:22] and this is how we connect we hold hands
[39:26] there's something so innate in us when
[39:29] they're suffering you can look at
[39:30] ukraine and see all the terrible things
[39:32] but you also see nations and
[39:36] doctors without borders and world
[39:38] central kitchen and people from every
[39:41] direction pouring in their love and help
[39:44] and support
[39:46] that is also us
[39:49] it brings us the deepest compassion
[39:53] impermanence yes
[39:56] dukkha
[39:57] part of this incarnation it's here baby
[40:01] it is us
[40:03] and yet
[40:04] it connects us in compassion and love it
[40:08] does
[40:09] so quiet and close your eyes again for a
[40:23] moment what is calling to you
[40:29] what suffering
[40:30] what loss what difficulty
[40:34] in your life in the world
[40:38] what is calling to you and saying yes
[40:40] don't avert your gaze
[40:46] let your heart open
[40:48] see
[40:49] feel
[40:58] and then what courage
[41:00] is asked of you
[41:04] you can know
[41:21] yes when compassion arises
[41:24] compassion is a verb it also says
[41:27] i must i will i find a way to make a
[41:30] difference
[41:35] now tiknot han from the mahayana
[41:37] tradition of vietnam teaches these three
[41:41] characteristics he calls him the three
[41:42] seals
[41:44] and instead of teaching dukkha he
[41:45] teaches nirvana
[41:48] because
[41:50] knowing dukkha is the gateway
[41:52] to nirvana to freedom or peace
[41:56] as zen master suzuki roshi who founded
[41:58] san francisco's end center
[42:01] said when you realize the fact that
[42:04] everything changes so now we're going
[42:06] back to anita
[42:08] and loss in dukkha when you realize the
[42:10] fact that everything changes
[42:13] and find your composure in it there you
[42:17] find yourself
[42:18] in nirvana
[42:22] nirvana isn't someplace else
[42:26] it is the freedom and the peace that's
[42:28] available to you
[42:31] with a quiet mind
[42:33] and an open heart
[42:36] when you become the loving witness of it
[42:38] all
[42:40] and then pain is inevitable
[42:45] but suffering is not
[42:49] you can rest in loving awareness and joy
[42:53] we can get so loyal to our suffering
[42:56] and forget that joy that joy i
[42:59] like to talk about of the books of the
[43:01] dalai lama and
[43:02] archbishop tutu laughing and joking the
[43:05] book of joy
[43:09] so dukkha gives birth to the great heart
[43:11] of compassion
[43:13] and then the last of three's three is
[43:16] anata
[43:19] which is translated as sometimes
[43:21] shunyatu is emptiness no self no
[43:24] separate self this is the hardest one to
[43:26] understand but you could sort of feel it
[43:28] when we were meditating together and i
[43:30] said now who are you toward the end look
[43:34] and you look and you don't find yourself
[43:39] there's the sensations and thoughts and
[43:40] experiences
[43:41] and there is awareness but it's not your
[43:44] awareness
[43:46] in fact you're not even there exactly
[43:48] there's just awareness itself
[43:52] nothing separate
[43:55] wes niskar my colleague and friend at
[43:58] spirit rock puts it this way he's a
[44:00] humorist as well he said here's the
[44:02] three characteristics
[44:04] life's hard
[44:06] it'll put you through changes don't take
[44:08] it personally
[44:11] and this is the third
[44:12] hanata that it's not yours
[44:15] the profound reality
[44:18] the invitation to step out of the
[44:20] fiction of separateness
[44:22] what's called the small sense of self or
[44:25] the body of fear
[44:29] where we get frightened or selfish or
[44:32] self-centered or cut off all of those
[44:34] things
[44:35] alice walker wrote one day
[44:38] when i was sitting there like a
[44:40] motherless child which i was it come to
[44:42] me
[44:43] that feeling of being a part of
[44:45] everything
[44:46] and i knew
[44:47] if i cut a tree my arm would bleed
[44:51] i laugh and i cry and i run all around
[44:53] the house
[44:54] when it happens you just can't miss it
[44:59] and we know this walking in the high
[45:01] mountains or making love or being there
[45:04] at the mystery of the birth of a child
[45:07] or the death of a human being
[45:09] silent like a falling star
[45:13] and all of a sudden we step out of the
[45:15] time-bound consciousness the
[45:17] separateness and feel ourselves part of
[45:20] the turning of the seasons of life
[45:25] you feel it on retreat you're doing
[45:27] walking meditation and all of a sudden
[45:29] you realize you're not doing it it's all
[45:31] just doing it itself
[45:34] it's amazing no self
[45:36] as one of my teachers said no self no
[45:39] problem
[45:40] more self more clinging more self
[45:43] centered more problem
[45:45] but it's like this
[45:48] when i look at my daughter
[45:51] she was born of an egg carried by her
[45:54] mother
[45:57] but the egg that was carried by her
[45:59] mother was actually there in her
[46:01] grandmother's body
[46:04] when her mother was an infant in her
[46:06] mother's womb
[46:08] the grandmother's womb carried the egg
[46:12] that became my daughter
[46:15] and then my daughter
[46:17] grows up as a woman and she has a child
[46:22] maybe she has a daughter she has a son
[46:24] now maybe she'll have a daughter we
[46:25] don't know
[46:28] who become
[46:29] a mother and grandmother and the eggs
[46:32] are there a couple of generations before
[46:34] and after we are not ourselves we are
[46:37] the whole chain of being
[46:42] and in one apple
[46:45] is the mystery of life that tree doesn't
[46:47] grow without the
[46:49] rhizomes underneath it in the forest
[46:52] floor and the
[46:53] you know the sunlight on the leaves and
[46:56] the the wind and the turning of seasons
[46:58] and the
[46:59] the the planting and the harvesting
[47:02] in an apple orchard or before that in
[47:04] the wild apples
[47:08] and the chlorophyll that turns sunlight
[47:10] into sugar now how's that for a miracle
[47:13] we live on a planet where light turns
[47:16] into sugar so you can be happy
[47:21] the biosphere the genetics of an apple
[47:24] and all of it's just happening baby this
[47:26] is
[47:28] selfless
[47:30] this is the form of life coming out of
[47:32] consciousness itself
[47:35] and expanding and opening in all these
[47:38] remarkable multitudinous ways
[47:42] and then a man came up to the buddha and
[47:44] said his name was mogarajan
[47:46] and he asked him a question three times
[47:48] when you asked three times that the
[47:50] buddha has to answer as it said
[47:53] he said tell me o blessed one you are to
[47:56] be supposed to be wise how can i live so
[47:59] that i will not be seen by the king of
[48:01] death
[48:04] and the buddha responded o mogarashan
[48:10] do not cling to anything
[48:13] as being yours alone as being self
[48:17] or i
[48:18] or
[48:19] mine
[48:20] and if you know do not cling to anything
[48:24] as self
[48:26] you will not be seen
[48:28] by the king of death
[48:32] so this is the invitation tiknot han
[48:34] talked about the seal of nirvana of
[48:36] freedom
[48:38] the timeless freedom that is who you
[48:41] really are when you don't cling to
[48:45] your body your feelings your
[48:46] relationships the things around you
[48:49] and understand when i say don't cling
[48:52] i don't mean don't care
[48:55] you know the difference you'll feel it
[48:56] in your body between attachment and love
[49:00] they're really different
[49:05] and you can live in the timeless present
[49:09] the consciousness of loving awareness
[49:11] itself
[49:13] and i remember my
[49:15] time with nisargadat this great guru in
[49:18] bombay
[49:21] where he said at one point my
[49:22] consciousness can enter into anything
[49:25] and i can feel the experience of it
[49:27] because it's all consciousness
[49:29] said when i understand when i understood
[49:35] wisdom
[49:36] sees that i am nothing
[49:39] love sees that i am everything
[49:42] and between these two my life flows
[49:48] i loved watching ramadas in the last
[49:50] years of his life because he was there
[49:51] in that wheelchair
[49:53] in a broken body where he couldn't move
[49:55] one arm and one leg where he had aphasia
[49:58] and he couldn't really speak
[50:00] fluently he
[50:02] grappled to find words he had multiple
[50:05] infections and physical traumas and bed
[50:08] sores at times and all these things
[50:11] he was about the happiest person i've
[50:13] been with ever
[50:17] really joyful
[50:19] amidst all the paralysis and aphasia
[50:23] how can you be so joyful ramnas and he
[50:26] said
[50:28] i am loving awareness i love it all
[50:32] i love it all
[50:34] the joy the sorrow the birth the death
[50:38] the spring
[50:39] and the winter
[50:45] so when you understand there comes this
[50:48] beautiful sense of freedom this is our
[50:50] incarnation
[50:52] and then from the little prince
[50:55] antoine de santa super he says
[50:58] first thing in the morning you look
[51:00] after yourself
[51:01] you brush your teeth
[51:03] and wash your face don't you
[51:06] well the second thing you must do is
[51:09] look after your planet
[51:12] it's not that complicated
[51:15] and the heart changes when we come to
[51:17] terms with change and nietzsche and
[51:20] realize oh
[51:21] we can trust that it wants to renew
[51:24] itself
[51:25] and we come to terms with dukkha and say
[51:27] yes that's part of incarnation you don't
[51:30] get out of it
[51:31] loss and change and pain and suffering
[51:35] and gain and pleasure all are woven
[51:37] together
[51:41] i don't know whether nice people tend to
[51:43] grow roses
[51:46] or whether growing roses
[51:48] makes people nice
[51:52] and i don't know the answer either
[51:55] but i do know there's a kind of joy that
[51:57] comes when we see
[51:59] with the eyes of wisdom and the great
[52:02] heart of compassion
[52:03] and trust
[52:06] oh nobly born
[52:10] remember this teaching
[52:13] for now and
[52:15] forever
[52:20] and as you know
[52:22] then you touch it spills out of you
[52:25] your joy your peace your acceptance
[52:27] your flexibility your non-rigidity your
[52:31] openness even with your own foibles like
[52:33] i do with mine and all of those things
[52:36] all held in the great heart of
[52:37] compassion
[52:40] and you become like those people in the
[52:42] tire
[52:43] store waiting room you be upon part of
[52:46] the communion of us
[52:48] of the open heart of life
[52:51] and this is possible for you
[52:54] alice walker says
[52:58] war will stop when we no longer praise
[53:01] it
[53:02] or give it any attention at all
[53:06] peace will come
[53:08] wherever it is sincerely invited
[53:12] love will overflow every sanctuary
[53:14] given it
[53:17] truth will grow where the fertilizer
[53:19] that nourishes it is also truth
[53:24] and trust will be its own reward
[53:28] teach yourself peace
[53:31] pass it on